I cannot tell you all how great it is to have positive support today. This community is awesome! I have felt so great about myself for the last month or more. Lady night was a great night for me until 1am and everything blew up again. I wonder if it would just be easier to not be here. I wonder if it would be easier for her if I wasn't here. I refuse to give her a blank check to ruin our family. I have told myself that I wouldn't leave my kids and I would stand and fight. I will not leave my family, no matter how painful it is to be here.
The hill that I am willing to die on is my belief in the sanctity of marriage and the importance of having a mother and father for children. I see teenage kids every day with broken families and I cannot stand it. Our children get the idea that relationships are disposable. It makes me sick.
As far as DBing, if W is no better than she was 6 months ago, should I shift gears and try another tactic? She is noticing my changes, but I certainly am not getting the desired reaction from her. MWD suggests trying something different.
May be time for me to go dark in my own house... Being cordial and not pursuing has given her the space to continue her EA with OM. I'm very lost today.
Both 40 T-22 M-18 S13 S11
Bomb, ILYBINILWY-7/10/13 EA #1-confirmed 7/10/13, ongoing since 5/13 EA #2-9/13/13
