Sorry you are having a rough day pudmuddle. I went through that a couple of weeks ago. I had been DBing and seeing progress, really GALing and taking care of myself. I truly felt better about myself and then one night and one set of circumstances sent me spiraling. I wound up crying by myself while everyone else in the house including W were asleep. I had held all that in for quite a while trying to keep myself together. The bad thoughts, the loss, the rejection all rushed back in that night and I sobbed uncontrollably alone for over an hour.
You aren't weak for letting it happen. We need to feel the pain and let the emotion happen. It's part of the process of healing. Its great that you went for a jog and did it for yourself without H seeing it to begin with. Try to be strong and know there are lots of us out here struggling along with you.
Definitely thinking about you today.
Both 40 T-22 M-18 S13 S11
Bomb, ILYBINILWY-7/10/13 EA #1-confirmed 7/10/13, ongoing since 5/13 EA #2-9/13/13
