I've looked at life from both sides now

[Raine]

Hey Pretty Wonka!

1) Are you two sleeping in the MBR on a regular basis now?
Yes. Every night since that night about three weeks ago. We were out of town for a week, and he spent every night in the same bed, including three nights in a small double bed when there was another bed available. It has gotten physical...he is instigating it.

2) Is either one of you wearing your wedding ring?
Nope.

3) Is H still reaching out to you go play online games?
Yes. And I'm not too great about always doing it, but see if I do, he plays right back. I don't start any of the games. He has to.

4) Where are the OWs? Any contact with them?
There has been some limited contact that I know of. Nothing in person, but there has been some messaging, that would be friend-like only. I think with OW4 perhaps to make sure she was okay, because he stopped talking to her and ignored all her msgs for three months. That however turned upsetting to me because she wanted to know if he was trying to work things out with me, and he said no, he is only working on himself and he wasn't ever happy in our R, so he doesn't see how that would fix anything. I am pretty sure that OW1 has given the heave-ho.

5) Is H more involved with the baby?
Yes very much so. He has even changed a few diapers this month, which is something he did a lot with the other boys, but never did with baby until a few weeks ago.

How's the Fonzie the Bear goin' for you?!
So I took off the night of my birthday, because he made it pretty clear he didn't plan to do anything for me and was even thinking of going out himself. He was upset at me for a day or so, wouldn't look at me, but he still slept in the bed the next night and put a pillow between us. But he has been okay since then, usually rubbing his feet on mine or holding me at night. I reciprocate but don't instigate. And he doesn't do anything outside of the bed, like hugging me goodbye or hello. He only shows affection outside of being in bed at night if I get hurt or I'm upset.

Big things:

1 - He invited me to his work for lunch with his parents. This is the first time I have ever been invited. We never went anywhere near the offices, but still shocking he would invite me to where OW1 is.

2 - He asked me to get a babysitter for two nights next week when his parents are gone. He wants to go out to dinner just us and he wants me to go down to hang out with his friends on his normal night. He has never invited me to do that before. That is his night and his friends.

Okay so all this is happening, but yet what I'm hanging onto is words like, "He was never happy in our R." I'm guessing I don't want to get hurt again. I can honestly say there are zero expectations, because I'm just not acting very positively about it. I guess I just assume everything can change in an instant. And I don't trust much at all because his parents are here and it all could be an act.