Is There Anything Left pt 5

[Not Quitting]

H has finally decided (once again) that he needs to have a man-to-man talk with S13. H wants him to spend Sunday at his place instead of H coming round the house. I don't have a problem with that but it is ultimately S13's decision and I told H that. He wasn't happy as he doesn't think a 13 year can make decisions like that, but I stood my ground. Told him that he needs to ask S13 if he wants to go to his place or not. I also told him that if our son does go to his place and decides that he doesn't want to stay after their talk then he is not to force the issue and is to let him come home. H agreed reluctantly. Knowing that his dad has an OW and actually hearing from the horse's mouth are two completely different things and I don't know how S13 is going to take it. H has always said that S13 is a wimp and needs to man up. He just doesn't get it that some kids are more sensitive than others.

It also seems that Christmas has been decided. I was informed by H that S13 will spend Boxing Day with him at his flat. I will discuss that with S13 after the weekend - from here on in I am giving S13 the decision as to what contact he wants. I'm not going to deny him contact, but if S13 doesn't want it then that will be his decision, not mine.

And before anyone gets any 2x4s out for what may be perceived as be confrontational or deliberately causing opposition, I need to add that H admitted to already having had at least one beer (and it's only mid-afternoon here) and he doesn't start work for another couple of hours - and he works in a bar so isn't supposed to have any alcohol in his system but he doesn't care and hasn't for several months (before BD). That is not exactly an environment I want my son in. H thinks nothing of cracking a beer at 11 in the morning, and he doesn't stop at just one.