Packing is underway...Should be leaving out over this coming weekend. Will stay at friends house until I find something suitable. Thank God Knoxville is a pet friendly area. Had a great weekend GALing. Mainly hanging with grandson, watching his soccer game etc.
All remains quiet on the WAW front. Guessing it will be this way for sometime. Remaining detached is the key. Someone this weekend told me this is somewhat like a game of hardball. The WAS leaves with minimal contact on thier part because of how they have/are feeling. Then occassionally when thier guilt overtakes them at certain times they make brief contact only to make themselves feel better. Reasonable assumption I guess. However, I'm sure not all sitchs' resemble this thought.....
I said this to a friend the other day from another forum. I don't go on the forum anymore because they don't follow the DB guidelines and it was a difference of opinion. I still keep in touch with this friend via PM. Anyway he said that he couldn't understand why W doesn't want him back, yet when he's round at their house she treats him as family and he often has dinner round there. I said the exact same thing to him, it is to make her feel better and give their D some sort of family life. Well done on the GALing, keep it up No peeking out on W either, well done
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Well TTD, in my case it would be just to make her feel better I guess. She has her family where she is at now so no need to have me around her for any guilty feelings. I do wonder though, AS keeps mentioning a little contact should be made just to keep them from deleting you from thier mind completely. And yet any contact I made in the past didn't seem to bring out anything much from her.
I guess for now I will continue to stay n/c as it is confusing what the right thing to do is. Or there simply is no wrong or right thing in my sitch it's difficult to say. It's out of my hands anyway's...........
It's easier to stay n/c believe me, less heartache You won't get a negative response from her if you don't.
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
So today I get mail for my W that she should have. It has been quite sometime since I've gotten anything important for her. I'm guessing I should send it even though I'm try to stay dark? The address I still have is her sons as she doesn't want me to know her home addy. That makes no sense but I am not going there again...UGH...
If she doesn't trust you enough to give you her addy then I would mark "return to sender, no longer at this address" on anything you get for her and send it back.
Wow AS, that is a surprising answer from you. But you might be right. She gave me her sons addy when she was living there. She did though know she was moving to her new place and yet gave me her sons in care of addy for me to send mail. She also has had a new email addy she doesnt want me to have. We use her old one for the limited contact we have.
The only thing she provided me was her new cell number back in July which was a complete surprise to me that she made the contact via email to do so. You know, your right I am not sending her that mail....
Again, there is no way I deserve this treatment from her and why I have struggled so much with what/why she has/is doing. This is beyond the scope of a normal WAS simply cutting someone out of their life the way she has with no discussion or reason. I'm sure in her mind she has her reasons but to go from normal to zero in just a few hours...uh huh...
Thanks for the response AS, you reminded me why I was going dark myself now....
I faced similar sitch with the address. For a long while, I had to send stuff to Ms. Wonka's sister's house before Ms. Wonka was comfortable enough to give me her new address after she moved out. It is the Berlin Wall thing...don't take it personally.
Emails are safe for WAS because they can control how and when to read/send emails. It is the idea of giving away their new address which makes them vulnerable and exposed as if we just might barge in their new front door!
Hi Wonka, thanks for responding in. I hear you about the berlin wall thing I really dont understand that way of thinking though. We are now 6 months into this and she knows I am not going to go pounding on her door. Hell, she's 900 miles away from me good grief....Anyways, how long was it before ms. Wonka gave you her new addy? just curious.
If you been reading up on my thread with no new anything going on positive I am going n/c. I have no choice as nothing I have previously mentioned in emails to her have had any affect. Same ole icy coolness since she left....Only thing is, now I am feeling better about moving forward (even though this still hurts sometimes)and n/c seems to be helping me greatly.
Kind of surprised though she has not filed yet but, that still may be forthcoming. When she totally ignored my bday I knew her fog was still in full fogginess!!
No peeking out on W either, well done 