@ntx/labug/faltiltre/2nd - I'll respond specifically, but maybe should put this out here first:

So, now it gets even crazier. I honestly just sat here and laughed for a couple minutes because I thought this couldn't get any weirder, and then it did. Maybe you all think I'm just an idiot and floating in the wind, but other than completely avoiding W at all costs, I don't even know.

After the R talk and validating, W called me several times. I finally answered, and she asked me to come over. I was a bit taken aback, and asked her why, and she just said, "Please come over". I asked her if everything was all right, and I could hear some tears in her voice, and she said, "Please? I'm asking you to just come."

So, I was about to go to lunch anyway, and the food places are near her house, so I thought "what the heck, why not, what else could go wrong?" I got there, and S5 was running around, so she asked me to come into another room, and closed/locked the door. Then she stood there for a long time, kinda looking at the floor:

W: "I don't know what to say, but I wanted to talk to you in person."

Me: "Well, this is awkward!" *smile*

W: "I want to try to make our marriage work. I'm in. I think we should start very slow, maybe just date once a week to start. If I agree to try, can we still keep the divorce and just put the delay in? I only want to keep it in because I'm still very scared, and I'm afraid this is all not real, and I don't know if I could honestly try if it was dismissed - but you're right when you say that if I don't do SOMETHING, we'll just drift into divorce."

Me: blink. blink. "Are you sure? I'm glad you feel this way, but I know we've both been back and forth a lot, so I want to make sure we're not making emotional decisions."

W: "Even when I was furious at you and almost hated you a few weeks ago, I still loved you deep down, and that's really never changed. Even when we argued, no matter how much I tried to stop having feelings for you, I couldn't. So, I figure if we just back into divorce its just going to make me miserable because I'll still be loving you."

Me: "I really appreciate your honesty, and opening up. Again, we have been all over the board, flipping from divorce one day to saying "I love you" the next. Since your aunt is coming up for a week, why don't you spend a nice week with her, and if you still feel this way in a week, we can talk again?"

She agreed that would be a good idea, and I left.

^^^ THIS is why I have no idea what to do from day to day, or even hour to hour.