I think wearing the ring is a personal choice. I am forgetful and was never consistent I wearing mine daily over the years.... So it was easy for me to pack it away and not wear it for the last 2 months. A few weeks ago I felt like I should get it out and start wearing it again...so I am wearing the band now.
As far as you writing her a note and giving her money. I would say no right now.
When my H camd to visit...(I knew we were in trouble...but I wasn't expecting BD) I picked him up from the airport...once we got back to the car I gave him a welcome home card that expressed my gratitude for all his hard work for our family etc.. (in attempt to speak his love language and validate things he's said in the past)...with-in an hour of his arrival he told me he was done... later that week he told me it was too late for things like the card and that I was only doing all these things b/c of him wanting to leave etc...
Hopefully someone else will chime in...but yeah my opinion is told hold off for now.
me: 30 H:30 tgthr:7 m:4 no kids 5 counseling sessions initiated by H as a LR: Oct 2012 long distance marriage b/c of work since Nov 2012 official BD: July 2013 nothing filed 1/1/14 I dropped the rope
