AS, I KNOW they're real. I've validated her hurts 100s of time even if I haven't reported them on here. I've named and taken specific acceptance for hurts that I've caused, indicated I knew they were wrong, and made specific changes of habits for those that W has even said to me she knows are real changes. And I'm not quitting on HER, I'm just not going to keep trying to discuss the same crap over and over. And believe me I won't have any other relationships - whew, not worth it.

I actually later apologized to her for my anger and bluntness. I told her that having to relive mistakes of the past was very hard for me, especially when I knew how much it has hurt her, and I lashed out unfairly. She actually responded and accepted my apology, and said she was sorry for bringing up the past over and over, but she just didn't know what to do and felt like she couldn't trust anyone.

I left it there; didn't know what else to say except "trust ME" - but I knew that wouldn't fly. smile She has said "I can't trust anyone" for the last 6-8 weeks; how do you validate that?