WAW served me, 2 weeks in, looking for pointers

[Mimi00]

That was a great edit Mr. Cas.
You have awesome help in here K!

I know you wanted to see her I person so she could "see" the changes, but the way you handle communicating with her in matters like this will allow her to "see" them just as well.

[KdogGS]

Thanks Mimi, I'll keep that in mind.

I really appreciate everyone's input and help.

[KdogGS]

I've never been so nervous to send an email in my life. But I sent it. YOWZAAAAA

It's been a tough day emotionally. Still trying to detach.

[MrCAS]

Detaching can be hard. It is a critical step in your growth. It allows you to focus on you instead of your W or your sitch.

[KdogGS]

Here's the response I got-

"Thanks H. And yes, we can talk soon about dividing finances.


I saw your profile picture! You look really happy! I'm happy for you!

W"


She's referring to my FB profile picture, I posted a big smily photo, I havent been snooping on her stuff, it kills me to see her posts. I'm scared she's happy for me, because it seems like it will make it easier for her to leave me knowing I'm happy. ARGGHHH.

[MrCAS]

You are awfulizing right now. Stop it! You have NO idea what she is thonking right now. You are mindreading.

Hey, how dare you look happy when she is doing this to you... Who do upu think you are, mister?

Suppose, just suppose, that you just set her back a little bit? Possible? Lots of positive changes,,, maybe she might be wondering? Liking? Who knows.

This journey is about YOU, not her. You need to realize this. This is not a sprint. It is not going to come without you doing your due diligence.

Take a breath. You are worrying about stuff and wasting energy and brain power besides annoying yourself to the point of distraction.

[MrCAS]

And STAY OFF FACEBOOK!!!!

[KdogGS]

Thanks. I needed that tough love.

[AnotherStander]

I'm scared she's happy for me, because it seems like it will make it easier for her to leave me knowing I'm happy. ARGGHHH.

She has to see you happy before she will even begin to miss you. She will NEVER miss a sad, pathetic, desperate you. But a strong, independent, happy you? She may not miss that right away, but it'll make her think for sure. DB'ing has a cumulative effect over time, that's the way it works.

[uRworthy]

Hey K, let's turn this around for a minute. Play along, ok?

She is checking out your profile. Hmmm.

She is not seeing someone who looks miserable. And you wouldnt want her to see that guy, right? Cuz miserable, not attractive. Just sayin.....

She might be wondering, what's up with that? Wonder whats going on there?

The thing of all that is, it doesnt really matter. What matters is you and your journey. What matters is you becoming the man you want to be.

Look inside and decide what changes you want to make. Think about people you admire. Look at the things she has said. If some have merit, work on those. Toss the others away.

And then, everyday, be that man. Some days you'll make it, some you wont. But that should always be the goal.

Keep the focus on you, sweetie. Leave her to her own journey.