All of the veterans say this--over and over and over--in one way or another every day.
It only took me about a year to fully understand it!! (At least for my heart to understand the true meaning).
I thought I could hang onto part of the "security blanket" of my marriage and my H. I grew complacent in this idea that my spouse was a buffer to the world. I accepted that he would protect me and take care of me.
It was unfair of me to ask this of him. When we lived together, I had a much better sense of our being autonomous people. After a year together, I even asked for a divorce, but wanted to still live together, because I sensed the idea of "marriage" on both our parts would be our doom. I was right and should've listened to my instincts.
No matter what, you will have to let go of the old marriage and the old relationship. Wipe the slate clean. If you don't accept it, you will only prolong the grieving and put off dealing with the truth.
The truth is... things change, people change, families change, the world spins and changes everyday. We have a choice to accept it or fight it.
Heather
"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man
“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
