the WS seems to have a knack for manipulating you across that border.
This sounds like something I said in the past so I'll give you the same advice I got. While it may feel like you're being 'manipulated' to cross the border it is your decision if you go or not. I knew what was happening every time I jumped back on the ride but I wanted things to work out so bad I kept jumping and then getting hurt when W went back to OM or did something else stupid. Every time it was my fault.
Quote:
The cycle seems to be 2-3 weeks of her stating that we are working on the marriage, followed by an incident of out of work contact and a sudden change of heart to wanting a divorce.
Typical for the WAS. They are very confused. Just stay clear of it and concentrate on you.
Quote:
I recognize that this is the rollercoaster but I don't know if I can get off of it unless I ask her to move out. When we get to that point, she always claims that she wants to work on things.
Also pretty typical because she's confused and may be doing a little cake eating. Has she ever felt like she'll lose you? Are you ready for that? It seems like there are some boundaries floating around without consequences. Are you really ready to enforce the consequences (be 100% sure you are)?
And you can go dark/dim while still living in same house. It's tough but many of us have done it. Just find something or somewhere else to be when she's in the house.
Personality is who the world sees, character is who you are
