Man, I feel like I must come across way crazier on here than I am in real life.
Not at all, you're just following your natural instincts which is decidedly "not crazy" However, DB'ing is all about fighting those natural instincts and doing something different. DB'ing works a lot better, so we keep pushing it even though it doesn't "feel" right when you do it.
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Anyway, W told me, "I don't want to end up like MIL - 27 years into a marriage and unhappy." You'll be relieved to know that I simply said, "I understand that you don't want to live in a marriage like that."
OK, not bad, but try to get her to expand on things like this. Why is she afraid the two of you will end up that way, what are her fears and concerns? Try to get her to talk about her feelings, and regardless of what they are- good, bad or otherwise, validate them. Don't try to convince her things will be different, just listen and validate, listen and validate.
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She invited me over Thursday night to watch TV and hang out. I declined, "crazy busy with work". I'm hoping I get a gold star from AS!
LOL! That was a good move for sure Next time just tell her "crazy busy", let her wonder what you're up to. Create some mystery!
However, DB'ing is all about fighting those natural instincts and doing something different. DB'ing works a lot better, so we keep pushing it even though it doesn't "feel" right when you do it.
