"homework" from job - Hi Job, thank you

[Pudmuddle]

So I had some thought that I wanted to post here so that I can get them out and perhaps then be able to think more clearly on the subject. Any input is appreciated.

I've been thinking how I just don't like the person my H has chosen to become. I like the person he used to be, and the person he has the potential to be, but not who he is now. I don't like the decisions he makes based off of how he feels at the moment and who he is influenced by.

He has a low self-esteem at times and is easily swayed by listening to friends and what they would do. He doesn't seem to have a mind of his own on making good choices. He is most easily influenced by women and makes his choices from what they say, not from what he wants. He doesn't seem to want to delve any deeper into his issues or think it might be him and his issues that aren't making him happy. He is constantly turning to others to make him happy and not being happy inside first. I think this is why I got so exhausted and depressed because as hard as I tried he could not be happy with himself. And I could not make him happy.

I'm really wondering whether I want this type of role model in my S16's life. Not that we have a choice, since he is his father. The other thing is that a while ago I asked that he lie to me about when he was seeing AW and also to not tell his S. He listened to me and did not have the strength to stand up and say I will not lie. This is also the second time he has made the decision to cheat. This tells me more and more who he has become and I do not like it.

I'm thinking more and more of taking more serious measures to get him out of my life because I do NOT like the person he is now. I cannot make someone else happy. I can only add to the happiness they have inside.