Over the last couple of days, we have had the longest text-conversation that we had literally in months. Really, he had all but disappeared from my life...I got random texts once a month and now lots of them. Cars seem to be a safe topic.
I recognize that for those of you living with your MLCer that making a big deal of contact with mine might seem weird. It sure feels weird. I was not only moving forward, but moving on, making my own future plans without any consideration for he may or may not be doing. I lived like he was never coming back - not even through text! It has almost been a year since I have seen him.
The texting basically encompassed the details of our respective cars. I named my car and he asked me for suggestions for his. (Just a quirk of mine, I always name my cars). I gave him a name and he is going to use it. I could not help but think if GF was around, isn't it kind of awkward to use the name I suggested?
Although I no longer give her space in my head the way I used to, she is a deal breaker for me now. If she is in the picture, I am not. Not even casually. If we ever rebuilt even a friendship and he meets someone else after that, if he is not honest with me, I walk. If we could be friends - real friends - which includes some real discussion and remorse, I am open to that even if it means not reconciling as a couple. Especially if he is more determined to do the "white picket fence". Because I am not. For the very first time in my life, I am going to stick to the "label" - "friends" means that and "girlfriend" means another.
Rosa, you gave me something to think about. I am embarrassed to say that I never thought of letting him know that my dad was going into surgery. I guess it is because he had vanished so completely until very recently, that I did not feel the need to share any aspects of my life with him. I was moving on and as far as I was concerned he was not a part of my life. I do not know whether or not I will tell him, even now. (Anyone else want to chime in?) But thank you for at least making me consider it.
