First of all, I am so pleased that your surgery went well. A little bit freaky to hear it described while you are listening, though! Take care of those eyes and take care of you. Let H pamper you - don't worry about the reason.
That was quite a conversation you had with H. And I am so proud of you for doing so well. I am sure it was unbelievably difficult to listen to his ramblings. See how they don't make sense? But the strange thing is that perhaps when they start to talk this way - being somewhat self-aware of their actions - that may mean he is peeking out a bit. I worry more when they are keeping things inside. Well, or screaming at us.
This conversation sounds like it has been stewing since he returned from Russia.
Personally, I think this conversation called for honesty and sincerity. He was letting you in. Mystery can come later. It will come naturally - I speak from experience! - because you know that this situation cannot last forever for your own sake. Loving him and loving YOU enough to let him go.
Maintaining a friendship, Rosa, may not be possible. It really does depend upon the MLCer. I made the assumption that xSO and I would stay "friends" because as devastated as I was that he turned to another woman, I truly believed that if he wanted his white picket fence and knew that was not something I could give him, I would support that decision. But, I assumed that being friends would mean "being friends". It didn't. Except for very recently, he did not even treat me like a casual acquaintance.
You may change your mind about being friends. RT might change your H's mind. His actions will guide that decision. You deserve respect.
Now from this day forward, keep on detaching and leaving him to his own devices. You need to rest!
