BOMB WAS DROPPED!! Now What??

[newman7977]

"So, I'm confused at how being strong and telling her what I want and how it's going to go down is going to do anything more than piss her off and completely change her stance of not pursuing my 401(k), IRA and property. At 46 years old and the economy we're in and how the future looks for this country, I'll never be able to make that up.

If she leaves, she leaves. But I want to stay in my house and have shared custody of our kids. After all, she WANTS to leave, not me. So she should go and start her new life. Not take mine."

DD,

I too did reason with my W in the beginning of my sitch that didn't work the books and vets here reconnected me to my old self and took a stronger stance on my sitch.

Don't be afraid of pissing her off, especially if you are standing for your values and your M. From now on it's all business like, from now on your focus is YOU and the kids. I like that you lay down that boundary and protect it. No more her flaunting this A in your face. You have to gain back your respect, you lost it by wooing her knowing her A's.

You do a 180 and take a strong stance. Get that confidence back...no more reasoning. If she wants so bad to go let her go and open her cage...convey to her that you will be ok without her and you can take care of the kids.

These guys are giving you solid advise. Ask more questions through your L. Your house and 401 k will be divided 50/50 because it was acquired during M, "community property", at least this is what I learned from my consultation.

Got to get going here DD. keep posting.

Newman