Well, having sex outside the marriage CAN have an effect on her interest!
It will do something. Either her agreement for it and ssmguy going for it, and actually sealing the deal with another willing lady might drive her crazy or burn her up. Or she just won't care.
The "won't care" possibility seems the most likely of the possibilities you list. But you left out a possibility. Was that because you didn't think of it, or you don't think it's humanly possible? Namely, the possibility that she would be happy to see me enjoying myself with someone else? The cultural assumption seems to be that one MUST place a higher value on a partner's involvement in our sexual fulfillment and security than the partner's sexual fulfillment. Of course, I'm not assuming that possibility, but just wondering why it's often assumed to be impossible.
I just find that people's general sexual attitude is often a little bit too much "what's in it for me". I guess I'm just questioning some basic assumptions about romantic love. You say you love someone, meaning you care for them deeply, and you say sex and love are closely tied. Yet the moment the sex stops, or the partner has sex with someone else, you suddenly don't love them. Really? That's not the way I feel about it, even if my wife were to have an affair.
