NEW LIFE / NEW ME - TAKING OFF!

[Fartiltre]

It’s Monday and the weekend have been great.
Lots of good GAL with children and just joyful times.

I am still seeing all the little situations where W is supposed to be around and I miss her so much. I can’t see any solution to this but time. I am to the best of my abilities following advice about GAL and focus on me.
There have been no contact at all for some days and I have been OK with that.

This morning I received an e-mail

Hi all
Do you want to come along when D6 has her first tjeck at the school-nurse.
They recommend that we come along.
If so, then se when it fit in to your schedule and let me know. I will book it.
I don’t think we should go on the 22. since she is attending a birthday at 1PM

I hope you enjoy
Say hi to all

PS What time do you plan to drop them off Wednesday

Autosignature.


School nurse is simply a tjeck up on height, weight and so on and nothing important.
Reading this e-mail I saw a Facebook update about her doing some work in her kitchen. I wondered because she normally dosnt post on FB at all and now suddenly a long post about her putting up some shelves and rewarding her self with a steak, salad and wine.
What hit me was that my family was liking and commenting this. My SIL (whom I don’t like and W as well) in fact invited her to visit them.
I need to shake this off and get the focus on my life.


I am going to reply something like.

Hi

Everything is just fine. D4 is still having respiratory issues but it is getting better.

I do not see the need that we both go to see the nurse. I will gladly take D6, but if you would like to see what goes on, then that will be just fine with me.

I expect to drop Ds off around 10.00-10.30AM on Wednesday.

F


Advice?

I have also several times been hit by that nobody is asking about W/sit anymore. Ws cousin visited me yesterday and mentioned nothing about W. I visited 3 mutual friends separately and they mentioned nothing as well. One did ask if I had let the anger go but that’s all.
It feels like everybody knows something that I don’t and my mind has been circling around what W is telling about sit – if anything at all. This anger-thing made me wonder if W thinks I am angry and have been telling this to people that knows me.
Is this a normal feeling? Is it just me? Is it just the sit expanding to friends and family?

I never mention W and I don’t talk about her even if people ask. I have had good convo’s about some of the books I read, the work I do and especially about the children and how they cope.
I guess the answer to this is that since I do not talk about it - people don't ask.
It like the elephant is in the room all the time but nobody points it out. It is not a pleasant feeling to carry around but I don’t know what to do about it.

I talked a lot about children-issues with a local guy yesterday and he said several times that I also need to mind myself. He properly looked right through me but still he said I was doing well and that he likes all the initiatives I have taken about meeting up with or without children. “You are inspiring several people to do the same at the moment.”

Babbling! Over and out!