dingo - that stinks, I'm so sorry. I know not every situation is the same, but maybe this'll keep your chin up.
My W has already filed, and was debating dismissing the divorce. Last weekend, we had a great time together, lots of laughing and snuggling and hugging, but then all of a sudden. she said she wanted the divorce. I asked her about the delay we had discussed, and she said, "No way".
That was Sunday evening, and on Monday we went to court to schedule divorce trial dates. I didn't say a peep to her until Wednesday afternoon; she texted me out of the blue and said, "We can do the delay."
Things are still sort of all over the board, but stay strong, and focused!
