First of all have you still n/c with the W or are you getting on at the mo? This will change the answers I give you.
1. What would your W's reaction be if you told her you were transferring? Would you feel better by letting her know? You could always send her a Christmas card with your new address in it. If she needs to get in touch with you then she'll find a way I'm sure.
2. I wouldn't
3. My anniversary was a few days after my H walked out so I didn't acknowledge it at all. If your W acknowledges it then send a thank you email and wish her a happy anniversary as well. Otherwise just ignore the date.
4. They've been ignoring you so I would ignore them. Whatever you do will not build a relationship back up with them anytime soon. My parents will not appreciate a present from my H. Maybe send a card if you want to, but see what the others think first
5. Definitely not! If you've not heard from her solicitor then she may have withdrawn. My H threatened me with a solicitor in June, then realised he couldn't afford it.
I hear what you're saying about the kids knowing that you've done everything you can about the sitch, but believe me they'll know If it works out in the future then great, if not then you can tell your kids that you tried your best I know that you've had no contact from your W and they will think that you've not tried your best but I truly believe that you should keep things as they are. You can explain to them all about 180 and DBing if it doesn't work out. Hope that helps. Feel free to ignore everything I've said Wait and see what others think as well.
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
