It's been a crazy morning here at work, which is why I'm a little later than usual in logging in and posting.
Meredith, Pam and CBH--Thanks for everything... it was a true pleasure meeting all of you. Mer, a special thanks for lugging me around all weekend and devoting your time away from your S. Big hugs!
I had a really fun time and it was good getting away.
Ok, Bob put on her (his) smiley face when pulling into the garage--a little difficult because I had to pee really bad! I walked in the door and gave a VERY enthiastic "I'M HOME AND I MISSED YOU ALL!" greeting. D9 came running down the stairs and gave me big hugs and kisses.
I walked upstairs to my bedroom to find D6 sprawled in bed with a blanket and watching Cinderella 2 on Disney and Mr. W. slumped over in sleep. He had a severe case of bed head and smiled when I gave a less boisterous Bob Barker greeting.
It was now about 9:45 and we exchanged pleasantries (and he updated me on stuff) before announcing he really needed to get home to sleep.
I took things from there.
D9 ended up asking me if Mr. W. had called me at all on Saturday and I said no and asked her why. She told me, "Well now I'm really mad because I told him to call you." I asked what this was about, because her face was showing some sort of anger and belligerence....
She said, "I wanted you to tell him that it is true that I hate him so much." Uh oh.
I asked her to spill the beans--it took me about 15 minutes to get her to the point where she would tell me--and she finally blurted out, "Mom, I miss him SO much and want him to come home really bad, and it's looking like he never will."
I gave her a hug and told her that I understood, but asked her if it was really fair to everyone to lie to her dad about her feelings? She said when she isn't missing him and loving him, she really hates him...
I looked at the clock and said, "D9, it's now 10:35 and it's time to sleep. We'll talk about this more later, if you like."
About a half hour ago, I heard my office phone ring from the reception area and ran back in time to catch it before the caller hung up--it was Mr. Wonderful.
"Oh, Bets, it sounds like you're out of breath. Should I call you back?" He sounded happy and decisive. Hmmmm.
?????? I'm a little nervous now. I said, "No, I'm fine, I just ran from up front. What's up?"
MW: "Do you have a few minutes? Maybe you need to shut your door?" Uh oh.
Well, it turned out that he wanted to discuss the golf tournament. He needed my clarification on a few things and asked for my help as well (which I can do).
He made the segue into the weekend and told me what they had done over the weekend in my absence. D9 already gave me a thumbnail sketch, but he filled in the blanks.
A highlight: he took the girls to the gym at his apt complex, where they all worked out for an hour. He started laughing when telling me that D6 was using the bow flex, attached to 50 lb weights! OMG! I always knew she was strong, but I had no idea she could do this. He said they really worked hard for an hour.
I decided to ask him what his opinion was about D9 over the weekend? He spilled the beans...
MW: "Bets, I really don't know. I know that she was really missing you, though. She was VERY moody, and I couldn't seem to help her much."
Me: ? "Hmmm."
MW: "Saturday night I had invited Gary and Pam over for dinner as compensation for helping me move. Well, Gary had something come up with his brother at the last minute, so only Pam showed up. D9 remained in the bedroom and wouldn't come out for dinner. It was embarrassing me, and I finally told her that. I was very upset with her because she not only wouldn't talk to me, she treated Pam like crap."
Me: "I think I know, K."
MW: "What? Can you give me an idea?"
Me: "Mr. W., D9 might have had the impression that you are dating Pam. It probably made her feel really insecure and unhappy."
MW: "WHAT? Pam is only my friend. She knows this. For crying out loud, she's been on my bowling team forever. That is completely stupid."
Me: "Mr. W., if you are only friends with her, why not tell D9 that?"
MW: "Well, I'll have to clear this up tonight. For the record, Pam is only a friend."
Yes, I know this. D9 has told me that Pam and Gary have some attraction for each other...
Me: "I understand, and it really isn't my business. But if you would explain this to her, I think she would feel better and might give both you and Pam an apology."
MW: "How did you figure this out?"
Me: "It just makes sense to me. Oh, what is your side of the phone call thing?"
MW: "I really have no idea. She told me she hated me and wants you to confirm this."
Me: "K, she doesn't hate you at all. She misses you horribly and wants you home. This hurts her so much."
MW: "Well, she has a weird way of showing me this, even though I DO know she wants me to come home. She asks me when all the time. I'm still not ready."
Me: Avoiding the last comment because I know this. "Mr. W., she's a little girl and very confused and insecure. She hasn't gotten anywhere by being honest with you, so I'm guessing that telling you negative things gets you to listen to her more."
MW: "Um. You might be right."
Me: "She really doesn't hate you at all. She wants you home and with me. Can you see this?"
MW: "Um, yes. I get it."
Me: "But I'll talk to her about this some more too so you don't feel pressured with this subject every time I head out of town."
MW: "Thanks. To change the subject, are we still on for dinner tonight?"
Me: "Of course! Where do you want to go?
MW: "Since you're paying, I don't get a choice, right? (He was humorous and joking.)
Me: "It's your birthday, why wouldn't I let you pick? I was thinking either Black-Eyed Pea or Chili's, though if you want something else, that's fine."
MW: "Oh, I haven't been to BEP for a really long time. Their food is good and the girls like it too. That sounds like a good idea."
Me: "Okay. Black-Eyed Pea it is."
He then proceeded to tell me how he's made a resolution to get up and head into the workout room every other day because he feels so much better today. He sounded suprised that it made him feel (and sound) as good as he did.
All in all, a micro R talk without any drama. Who knows what will happen over the next few days...
That's it for now.
Bets
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
