I read this post of yours about a week ago. I am sorry nobody has replied to you yet.
I think your question is a tough on because everyones situation is different and yet the same. I don't think there is any one trigger that will make the MLC/WAS leave OM/OW. There are too many variables that go into our R. They all will have similarities though.
As far as doing something to help end their relationship with OM/OW, start with these,
GAL 180's AsIf's Get yourself in shape by eating right and exercising. Sleep and rest Stay busy doing things for your self Become the person your spouse would be a fool to leave.
the bottom line is that your S fell in love with you before. Now she has fallen out of love with you. She has demonstrated that she can change her mind and she can change it back. She can choose to love you again. It is her choice though, not yours. All you can do is to be a person that she would want to be around again.
There are no guarantees though. That is why you must change yourself. You only have control over one person in this life and that is yourself. don't worry about her for now. Worry about you and go find what makes you happy. Then go do it. TODAY!!! Not tomorrow.
