Well, D9 had to literally grow up when her sister was born. It makes both me and Mr. Wonderful sad sometimes to know that she's had to step up to the plate to help in areas where most kids don't have to. However, she's a really nice little girl and God must know what the heck he's doing.
I learn from my kids every day, when I decide to see the lessons that await me.
Ocean Update:
Trish was kind enough to answer an e-amil I had written to her, indicating that I was at the end of my rope. I had it waiting for me this morning, which was great timing.
She was astute in pointing out that Mr. W. lacks maturity but does not seem to possess great character defect. I agree with this.
So my promise to sit tight and do nothing is here in black and white for all to see (thank you so much, Trish, and a big e-hug is heading to PA right now).
Yesterday morning, Mr. W. phoned me to plan the D9 dropoff/pickup--she was heading back to work with me after the ortho appt. I told him that maybe it would be a good idea if we waited to talk until the appt because it was snowing. He commented, "Well, don't you want to go to the gym?"
I answered, "Yes, but if the roads are too awful, that would be selfish of me to expect you to go out of your way in bad weather so I could go." He seemed VERY surprised by that statement. Note to me: Was I really that selfish before he left? Or did it hit a nerve with him?
He said that was a good idea. Well, the roads were wet when I called him back, we set up the drop off point and time and I stuck to it. Only the roads were MISERABLE when the time arrived (the wet turned to ice quickly). He told me I should still go and met me there. Off we both went.
Side note: When loading something into the back of his car, I see he has bought folding patio furniture for his apt....
Bob Barker also paid a visit at home last night. I got home and had a little difficulty getting into the garage. So I dumped my stuff off inside, beamed at my family members (who, again, seemed happy about my wonderful attitude--though I think with the road conditions, Mr. W. was thinking I really have mental problems) and told them that I would be outside. I should have realized that nobody was listening...
So I grabbed the snow shovel and proceeded to clear the driveway, sidewalk areas, and porch--we have a 3 car garage, so the driveway is pretty big. I paid special attention to the snow piles around Mr. W.'s car and cleared them off.
After a half hour, he opened the garage door and shouted, "Betsey, WHERE are you?" I answered calmly, "I'm out here shoveling." Pause. "Well, come inside because your hamburger is ready." I said, "Ok, thanks. Let me finish and I'll be in."
It took another 10 minutes to finish. A more sedate Bob walked back in to find the family had pretty much finished dinner, though Mr. W. and D9 were both still sitting at the table. Cheerfully, I ate and chatted. D9 told me about her day and asked me to check her math homework.
Mr. Math Wonderful spoke up and said, "Would you let me check it instead?"
The old me would have been insulted, but the new me smiled and said, "D9, that would be a great idea, because your dad is so much better at math than I am." She looked at me a little incredulously and replied, "Mom, I know you know how to do long division...."
I just smiled and said, "Well, Dad is offering and more than capable, so go get your paper." Off she went.
All this validation, and Mr. Butthead didn't even comment on my shoveling or red freezing ears...
Bob Barker remained with us until he had to leave. I smiled nicely at him and told him to drive safely because the roads were really slick. He waved off with a sort of bizarre expression on his face.
And I was glad he was gone, because being Bob wears me out sometimes.
HOWEVER, I got my Good Housekeeping magazine and saw Dr. Phil on the cover... I conveniently left the article open to the page about marriage, hoping that he will read it this morning. Since I always leave magazines open on the counter when reading them, this is not out of the ordinary for me--and if he reads it, maybe it's a good thing.
Dr. Phil seemed to find the words to say things that I think Mr. W. should hear.
This morning he walked up to the bathroom where I was putting finishing touches on my makeup. D6 was watching Pooh and he commented that there was a late start for elementary schools. I hadn't known because there are no crawlers on The Disney Channel...
He walked out and I heard the garage door open, and out he went to reshovel the snow (a few more inches had fallen by this morning). I walked out to hop in the car and he was standing there, huffing and puffing, with the snow shovel. (Yes, he does seem to be out of shape after he moved out.)
Side note 2: All the stuff he accused me of preventing him from doing is not the case from where I sit. My post before about him not having time to himself is still the case, he has still not made time to exercise and seems to have all the problems that he had when he was living with me. Again, good news: I am not the problem.
I mustered a morning tolerant version of Bob, said thanks for clearing the walkways and said goodbye.
That's about it for me for now. Still fish sober and no more PMSing.
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
