1138, I understand it all. I am where you are.

I put myself on Match last year. I wanted some validation. I dated a few times. it was fun. but deep down was not what I wanted yet(at that time) Knew if h came back or made any inclination, I'd drop that person flat.

the pain is real, unbelievable. FY has good advice.
as for me that is what I am (trying) to do

M48 H50
M21 T26
S20 at college),S17,D15-cp, dev. delay- cogniv 5yrs old
PA confirmed 7/2012
H separates 9/2012
H move home 2/13& 7/13 lasted 2weeks.ILYNILWY
OW still in picture. h filed 10/13