Hi all,

Thanks for your various inputs. This is the text going to D tonight (her 4am):

Hi XXX - I am bringing salsa. I think you will find that being polite when making requests produces better results than what you wrote. Miss you, Pa.

MM - there is a book called "power of a positive no" that espouses the positive-negative-positive arrangement you talk about. The Hi and Miss you above are intended to be the positive elements in the message. It sounds like you are walking the walk on being assertive - good!

Are you being assertive in other areas also? How?

PM - yes, life without salsa and hot sauce definitely lacks spice (haha). Our Swedish friends often break out in a sweat when we have them over for dinner... I had a hot sauce break a few trips ago, and much luggage stank of it. Going through customs ('any food to declare, sir?') was exciting.

I am looking forward for more opportunities to push back (W will get a (rehearsed) earful when she asks if I've had a chance to think). Will keep you posted -

Thanks again to all,

L

M58, xW54
S22, D18
M 1984, D 2016
Living a new life.