I had a colleague today ask me if "all this heartache is really worth it?"
And, I know today is a BAD day to try to sort that out....BUT.
But, is it???? Is it worth how sad I am all the time? It is worth knowing he is lying to me about everything and I feel like a doormat?
Is it worth it when I can't seem to pull myself up enough to GAL and have a PMA? I just want to go home after work and get in bed and cry. Where am I supposed to have the strength to GAL?
All of my family and his family and all of our friends and coworkers keep asking me if it's worth it. They keep telling to get out of this M...."you deserve better", etc.
Most days, I am strong in my conviction to stand for my marriage...for my H. But, today, I am so conflicted.
And, most importantly, what about my four precious children? When is it time for me to let go for them?
I'm just venting...and rambling. It's been a whopper of a day.
Hey Angela- I get this ^^^^ and I'm sorry its a tough time for you.
Like Acc said, only you know when you have had enough and what that looks like to you.
I know for me that I wanted to be able to look my 3 sons in their eyes when they are older and let them know that I did everything within my power to try to keep our family intact.
I wanted to show them that no matter what life throws at you or how hard you get knocked down that you can stand for what you believe in with honor and integrity.
They were my motivation.
I have dealt with the pressure from family and friends as well. They simply don't have a clue what it is to have your family seemingly blown up and the planet pulled from under you.
They want you to not be in pain.
Letting go and moving forward does not mean giving up.
