It puts me in the position of implying that I'm sexually OK and that she is the one with a deficient sexuality
Yes this is always tricky, it's a common WAS defense. I go back to my analogy. If you told her you would never speak to her again, and she told you that your communication skills were deficient, you could rightfully argue that you are (1) entitled to speak to whoever you want whenever you want, (2) some people are less communicative than others and that's okay, and that (3) that not being talkative doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you.
You would be "right" on all three counts in the context of the broader population and society at large, but 100% "wrong" in the context of your marriage, because you would be failing to acknowledge, respect, and respond to your partner's needs.
Her sexuality is a problem because it causes a problem in your marriage.
Outside of the context of your marriage, it is not a problem at all.
It is deficient within your marriage, not outside of it.
The challenge is does she care that her behavior is deficient in the context of your marriage? It doesn't sound like it, and that is a problem.
Who cares what society and everyone else thinks? Her sexuality is important to YOU and she married you.
Now if you married her with the understanding that she was non-sexual, then it would be your DUTY to understand, respect, and support that position. That's not what happened however, she changed the rules after the fact.
So when will you discuss open marriage with her and when will you start practicing it? It will be good to see you getting your needs met.
Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11 Start Reconcile: 8/15/11 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced) In a New Relationship: 3/2015
