Second MLC?? Is that possible?

[2Times2Many]

Yes, he went to Moscow, Russia to be best main at his best friends wedding. Prior to leaving, all seemed to be okay. When I picked him up at the airport, all I had to do was look at him and know that the man the left was not the man that returned.

He never really gave me the whole story - said something made him snap - but never really identified what it was. I think he was partying, had sex with a girl and that is what did it. Until that trip we had an awesome marriage. I always figured he came home with a mountain of guilt and had to find someone to blame (other than himself) and reasoned in his own mind that he never would have done that if I hadn't been at fault in some way and invented a ton of excuses to blame me for his infidelity. He wanted to move to Moscow and find out if things would work out with her, blah, blah,blah.

I went through a year of hell and torment and finally, at dinner one night, I got up from the table, went to the bedroom and packed a suitcase. I left the house and checked into a motel, although I let him know, by phone, that I was okay. I didn't tell him where I was - he thought I was driving to my daughter's house about 2,000 miles away.

After 4 days, I went home and he said he had done some research and that he had a pattern of blowing up his life over and over and that if he didn't break the pattern, he would be doomed to repeat it. He said that now that he knew what his problem was, that he could fix it.

I have lived in fear for the past 7 years that this would happen again. I have done everything I can to make sure he is happy at home, help him build his business, etc. Yet, he seems to be repeating the same pattern. I can't say that I am totally shocked at what is happening now, but I did everything I could think to avoid it.

I think what snatched him back last time was that he thought he might lose me. At the time, he was financially dependent on me. In some respects, he still is. Our business has been a joint effort - I can't run it without him and he can't run it without me.

Now, he's gone off the deep-end again. It's like groundhog day - same story, different day.

He claims he had a heart attack about 6-7 months ago. Although I believe that something did happen, tests did not confirm a heart attack. He is using "his heart attack" to justify his new lifestyle. The same old "I'm taking care of me" stuff. And, he's doing the same as he did back then.

That period in my life was a living hell. I love him and probably always will, but I just don't know if I can go through that again.