It still p!sses me off though now that it is confirmed.
= NOT DETACHED [/quote]
Not completely detached but more detached than I was before. I know that I feel like I am on an up cycle for now. Lots more work to do on myself.
Originally Posted By: AnotherStander
After discovering EA/PA I can say that I am at a new level of detachment.
[quote=AnotherStander
Quote:
This is the kind of news that takes months to digest, so just step back and take a breath. You're likely still cycling, so just be patient.[quote]
I have suspected the EA/PA for many months now and have had some time to digest it. I do know that it will be very hard to see them out as a couple though. Im not looking forward to that.
[quote]But I would love to get some satisfaction with a face to face with OM.
Originally Posted By: AnotherStander
That's not satisfaction, it's revenge, and it will not help you get to where you need to be. In fact it'll likely set you way back on your journey.
I completely agree. That was a knee jerk emotional response that I think most people have when they find out this type on news.
Originally Posted By: AnotherStander
100% of churchgoers are sinners. Some try to assign higher and lower values to certain sins, but that's of our own making, in God's eyes all sins are equally bad. I'm not sure why to some people an affair is a deal-killer, Christ said that if you think it in your mind it's just as sinful as if you committed it, and what married person (whether WAS or LBS) has not at least fantasized about an affair?
Also agree about the sinners, myself included. As to why its a deal killer for me, this is the most hurtful thing that someone can do to another. Also, one of the reasons S says she is filing for D is that I didn't make enough money to suit her. I did not provide the lifestyle she feels she deserves.
Fair enough. So if she came back, whats to say she would not leave again. What she is doing right now is exactly how her and I got together when we first started dating. She was done with her boyfriend at the time and started pursuing me. She went back to him 3 times before she finally left for good. The reason she finally left for good is because she felt that she had a pretty good chance with me.
Same pattern as before. That should have been my cue to run like the wind. However, I have never loved anyone like I have loved her.
Quote:
The thing that gets me though is, she was brought up Catholic and we go to church every Sunday. OM is also Catholic. So now, two supposedly God fearing individuals, have committed adultery and could seemingly care less.
Originally Posted By: AnotherStander[quote
What would you all do about OM, particularly him and his kids coming over to our home while I am not there?
Originally Posted By: AnotherStander[quote
Nothing. OM is a symptom of your marital problems, not the cause. Any interaction you attempt with OM is just going to make your sitch worse. Possibly much worse. It's not unheard of for that to end in restraining orders and nights in jail.
Okay, but we are still living in the same house. I for damn sure do not want him there while I am still living there. If that's wrong then I have more issues than I thought.
As always AnotherStander, thank you for pointing out the flaws in my thinking. I do truly appreciate it. It helps me understand better what we are going through.
I would like to here from more of you here if you have the time to respond.
