Thank you my forum friends!

[chasingpavements]

Ok, Fly, how have you managed to make me smile, while at the same time hitting me with a 2x4?

Are you really in a place that you think divorce is better than limbo land?

Yes, I'm almost there!!!!

I understand what you are saying and you have given me some new things to consider. Thing is how do I move on while leaving a space in my heart for him still? When he told me he was done for sure and wanted to separate I was ok with that, cause I felt I could close that door, and move on. It was such relief. Now he's reconsidering.

Should I just keep busy and do my own thing, and act as though we are separated?

Here are some of the things that are holding me back still,

-going back to work in early November and worried that if I hold off on things with H that we will be dealing with this kind of thing right before I head back, and I will not be ready to go back
-worried about splitting finances, and if he wants to rent a house then I would like to get a separation agreement so we do not go into debt to pay for 2 houses
-worried that if I start on the work with my lawyer that I will be shutting the door for any reconciliation...

Ahhh...