Can you get a apartment closer to her...Why the need for a house right away? Any 2 bedrooms?
I understand the need for consistency and systems with Autism but the apartment would provide a place for them to come. It would also make a transition quicker and easier for your kids. Most importantly, it would provide you more time to look at the ENTIRE chessboard and watch how things shake out in the near/mid term.
Avoid anything that will tie you down the next 1-3 years. You just survived a bomb.......stay loose.
ME 38 W 37 T18 M5 D3 BD 1/7/13 PA Conf 2/11/13- Ongoing 2nd simultaneous affair Confirmed 4/19/13 W gets APT and begins transition out 5/29/13 First mediation appt 12/19/13