Harder and Harder......Part three

[Positivespin]

Enrolled D3.5 in a childcare "Facility" today. I asked when she could start and they said Monday..........I said "perfect"

D3.5 was in the classroom for an hour while Mommy,Daddy and the Principal were talking business. There was concern that she was "a little young for pre-K" but when we came back she was glowing, smiling, making friends and helping another girl to make letters with Popsicle sticks.

Teacher said she would fit right in and couldnt believe only 3.5.

So, D3.5 is soooo excited about going to "Big girl School" and just because, I stopped and got a HUGE cake and balloons to bring to the old Daycare to celebrate D3.5's "Last day of School"- 2 weeks early

My wife and I are an AMAZING team. This incident is simply another example. When my wife and I were speaking with the "Principal" (trying to get D in) My wife would keep looking at me as she spoke with the P.

This is my disconnect- I still struggle with if she doesnt HATE me why would she leave me? I still have, in my head, that sep or divorce stems from hatred or being in a abusive relationship. Im learning that those are MY parameters.......not shared by her.

So I guess I just wasnt that fun anymore....I wasnt the "drug". I was holding her back...She wants a new model etc

a different definition of marriage.

[jp787]

PM - My W often reminded me it isn't all about you, meaning she had a lot of crap that she was dealing with that wasn't about me.

Maybe your W has to find helself before she can find you.

[littleGTO]

PS- it is good you and your W can still be a good team in co-parenting. This will be very important no matter what the future holds!

I guarantee you that your W doesn't hate you. Not at all. In time she will learn that her "new model" just looked shiny and desirable b/c it (he) was new and that over time that shine will dull and look a lot less desirable.

It's all about TIME, I've realized... (but life is too short to stay stuck, so onward we go!!!)

[Positivespin]

This is purely a social experiment............and I am in a controlled environment

Tonight I took my best friends attractive wife out as a "thank you" for allowing meto clasp on to them in my time of need.........

I busted out the plastic and we played .......until 2am

During that time I met a VERY attractive woman.........after several hours of conversing and several hrs of drinking we hit it off.

However, I'm going GTO now she was 14 years younger then me .....and as my friends wife says " nothing but trouble" but sure is cute..........."

WOW what a feeling.....it's a adrenaline boost in a low time of ones life......when one realizes this can actually happen...and not just in a movie.................


Again, nothing happened and this is a controlled experiment.......I closed down a bar and I (now) have impaired whatever........but wow she gave me her business card...I know I'm a juvenile idiot. But DAMN! I scored a hottie. lOL!

I am texting tipsy because this is important for the male ego and psyche..........she will never return my text but..........there is life on the other side - if I can attract aattractive 24 yo ..maybe my wife??

Now we will go to sleep and return back to reality:)

[Positivespin]

Just went on a nice long bike ride..........again nothing happened last night- nor would I be close to ready for it. No more bars - sandi is right again

[JayMan]

Tonight I took my best friends attractive wife out

I'm having trouble getting past this part!

[Positivespin]

LOL!

When it's isolated like that it doesn't sound to good...........

All good- she would kick my ass. She has been out of work for three months and was getting cabin fever. My buddy was at a show and there was anew restaurant in town I wanted to try.....D3.5 wouldn't have liked it - no Mac and cheese

[littleGTO]

PS- "I'm going GTO now-she was 14 years younger then me"

I say "GOOD FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!" No harm in making conversation with someone to boost your ego a bit... as long as you go into these situations with your EYES WIDE OPEN (me too).

SOrry, but my advice might get a little anti-DBing considering where I"m at, so take it with a grain of salt!

[Positivespin]

Being with my wife for 18 years has drained ANY "game" I MIGHT have
had

So I texted (24YO)her on Sat afternoon
"I had a great time last night...Looking forward to the next time. PS"

She DID respond 20 mins later.....
"Yeah, it was good meeting you guys"

Now I know nothing about dating and texting these days.....I just stepped out of my delorean and its flippin 2013- NOT 1996 anymore.

So, Im told no text response is a blow off. A generic response like that? No clue.

So I didnt text back because I got no game and Im not going to be the creepy old guy(never mind creepy old seperated guy with a beautiful D3.5) Maybe someday ill get a text- most likely no.

So DB'ers why did I do this? "This doesnt sound too DB". This was not planned. It happened....Therefore, I acted "as if". "As if" my wife wasnt coming back because when your still screwing 2 men and spend 10 days away on vaca with one- its a HUGE mountain to demo. Furthermore, Honesty needs to be very important on this site. I posted at 2am Friday night because I wanted to capture the honest emotion I feltat the time-adrenaline. I posted the text response I got here because there is so much new world that I need to learn. I want this to be an honest timeline of evolution/growth.

Today is my 10 mth bomb drop anniv. I need to keep evolving into the best person I can be. Only then will I be the man that "only a fool would Divorce".

[jp787]

I had been going to the gym, I will be getting back there...

Thanks for aking.

I hope you continue to be honest, it is the only way I have gotten to hear what I really needed here