He did come back home, of course. With a lost puppy face he asked, is this what you really want? And I said yes. I told him this is too toxic for everyone and that I need space and time to heal and truly focus on the new baby.
He said, then you need to sign the separation agreement. I said, I will and then you will leave. Then he freaked out. Of course he was just threatening.
He says, "you just want to get rid of me"
Me: no, you know what I want
H: you want me to stay on your terms
Me: what other terms are there? We either live together as a married couple, working on their marriage, or we get divorced. Divorced people don't live together. Why do you want to stay?
H points at S1's room and my belly.
Me: and what do you think divorce is? You are in denial.
H: do you want me to be gone today?
Me: no, I need months to heal. Not just a day. I feel abandoned by you and it hurts me too much to have you around, but not have you.
H: you've abandoned me!
Huh??? And he left the room. He is probably sitting downstairs. I don't get him. I just want peace and be alone for a while.
