I hope you are having a nice time bonding with D16 on your long car trip Complicated. You poor thing, you've been thru a lot lately. But like rH says, you are a rock for your kids. The rock. The one and only rock right now.
It is so easy for our Hs to blame us for everything wrong in their world, isn't it? Hopefully he will start to listen to what his IC has to say to him, and drop that OW. She sounds like a real peach. And why is she talking to your girls? That doesn't sound right, H is a married man having an affair. She has a lot of nerve that's for sure!
This sounds hopeful to me Complicated: "Before he left he told me "you might lose the battle but you will end up winning the war". What is that supposed to mean. H said it might look like I lost him but his new counselor he thought was going to get him on the right track. He said that new c told him to dump OW. Ok so did old C."
To me, that means that your H realizes somewhere inside his crazy MLC muddled head, that his relationship with OW is not good or lasting. You know these OP only serve the purpose of bolstering their faltering self esteem. The relationships are not real, not based on reality. The OW is the battle but your marriage is the war.
I think H means that he realizes that it is you and his girls who he loves, and that he will eventually do what his IC tells him and dump that OW. Then his new IC will get him on track and help him to work on himself. Hopefully you and the girls are still around by that point. I think you are strong enough to stand that long!
Linda
Me 65, Ex 64 M 38 y 2 adult S, 4 G-Kids MLC 11/07 BD 12/09 D 3/14 Dating nice guy 7/14 Engaged to nice guy 12/17
