Thank you, slow it down. My mom and dad say the same thing. They think talking about the ow puts the focus on her. My jealous and hormonal mind wants to ring her neck and use some choice words to talk about her to H.
Remind me again why bad mouthing her is a bad idea?
Yesterday the therapist asked H whether he could stop communicating with her, at least until the baby is here. He said he didn't want it and the therapist said something along the lines of, "why are you afraid to cut contact with her for now? If she is really that into starting a life with you and your relationship with this woman is that strong, she can wait for you to do the right thing, which is to take care of your wife now."
H didn't say a thing. I think he gets it that this relationship is fragile and that without contact it would die, but he won't admit it.
The therapist did some listening exercises with us because we kept talking on top of each other and we are both horrible listeners. H had never even heard of the term "validating someone's feelings" and then rephrasing what is said. He was like, what's the point of validation of feelings? Huh???
So then I asked him on the way home, what do you think she was trying to say about ow. He kept dancing around the answer and finally said, "I guess she was trying to say it is a temporary relationship"
Anyway, H just called to see how I'm doing because yesterday I had so many contractions. I asked whether he'd like to go out to our favorite restaurant tonight and he said a cheerful yes.
