14th Thread to Somewhere Uncertainly

[TSquared2]

Hi RL,

Lol, I had to laugh at your being jealous of your own son...I just had that trigger and feeling the day before yesterday when W was being very affectionate with S2...I guess it's because we see that yes, they DO have it in them, just not for us, yet. Raine helped me see that. Let me guess, this son was the "one" H "buddied up" with, or tried to? From what I have read, we LBS are the last in line, so I take it as good that they are making their way back.

My plan, as far as all this EA/PA stuff goes, is to look at this "as if" a new R with a new person. At our ages, any new person would most likely have been with someone else, and if they haven't, that just might be a big old red flag, ya know? Lol... So is leaving the past in the past giving them a pass? Maybe? Probably? I am not sure, but FOR ME, I just don't want to dwell on and live in that particular past. If and when issues come up and need addressing, then I want to deal with them then, in the mean time, just get working on creating new memories, new vibes, new ways of interacting healthily. I just don't see how dredging through all the negativity and issues all at once and such will help, especially with my W. She does negativity just fine all on her own, and she IS working on that with IC now, and herself. Newest book observed out in "her area"...Conscious Loving: The Journey to Co-Commitment, and also good old Peale...The Power of Positive Thinking. So, I DO see effort. That, and the IC, were things I explicitly stated were needed...and her self-chosen deadline to decide is long past. And she is still here, and trying. Those "little things" continue to show up....

I would give H a few weeks or so to recover, and process his little journey, guys do that....takes some time... keep those expectations at zero and see what happens...he does have a lot to process. Hang in there RL!