I can start a project and leave it a few days before I finish it. I didn't have time today to call in at the charity shop, meeting my friend for a costa was much more important, lol.
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
TTD, you've just got your priorities right. Friends come before decluttering . After all, that bookcase isn't going to care whether you deal with it or not, but your friends might not appreciate being less important to you than a little bit of decluttering.
Both 50 S14 M 16 yrs (his 3rd; my 1st)
ILYBINILWY - 24 Dec 2012 H moved out - 27 Jun 2013 Legally separated - 6 Sep 2013 Closing the door and changing the locks
Maybe that's why I spend more time on DB than doing any decluttering because my online friends need me more than the bookcase Just another excuse, lol
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Ready the 2x4s... I'm feeling a bit down tonight. Just went to dinner with W. She seemed to forget it was supposed to be her treat. No big deal. I hesitated for just a bit and when I saw she wasn't reaching for it, I paid.
She was in a so-so mood. A bit crabby, maybe. Seems now I only get the crabby, tired-after-work wife. Except weekends. Those are usually pretty good. In the bigger picture, I always got the overweight, depressed W. Both times she's gotten in really good shape, someone else gets the skinny, happy W.
On the way home, she freaked out once thinking I was going to hit someone making a left turn - she doesn't seem to understand judging gaps in traffic - I should have gone to the next block to the light, even though it would have been out of the way. I exclaimed just a tiny bit sharply "no chance of hitting them" after she said "look out." This is nothing new - I *always* drive, and she *always* panics - or at least is nervous. I've been super good about not saying anything since we started doing things together again. This was a tiny slip, but I wasn't nasty about it and I made some small talk soon after to show I wasn't upset or resorting to my old, crabby ways. I got upset, caught myself, and let it go. Best I could do at the moment.
Lastly, I saw her texting in the car right before she left. Of course, I don't know who she was texting. Of course I know very well who I think she was texting.
The upset part of me wants to dig up her FB message where she said that I "made it clear I didn't want to know" and tell her that maybe I do want to know what the nature of their relationship is. I hate sitting here waiting to see if I'll make the cut as Plan B. I hate that she made clear that she "doesn't want to be physical" while I wonder all the time if she is with someone else.
Given that we were already in a long stint of the sexless marriage problem, it's been a loooooong time, if ya know what I mean. That testosterone again...
So, anyway, before you start whacking away with the 2x4s you have in your hands, what I'm *not* going to do right now is... well... anything I just said I wanted to do. <sigh>
I'm going to go pull some more crap out of a closet until my mind settles down a bit, then go to bed. There's a 99.9% chance she'll Skype or text me in the morning as usual.
No 2x4's MH - you're allowed to have your down days. You know what you're not supposed to do and you've said (in front of witnesses now) that you're not going to do it.
Maybe dinner at that place with the flirty waitress tomorrow night . Just get that testosterone under control first
I know the feeling about texting. My H was constantly texting someone. Of course I knew when its her as that's the only time he didn't tell me who he was texting . But then may be he just thought that I wouldn't figure that out now would I - guess he kept forgetting I'm a lot smarter than he often gives me credit for (at least since BD that is).
More crap out of the closet and in piles on the floor right?
Both 50 S14 M 16 yrs (his 3rd; my 1st)
ILYBINILWY - 24 Dec 2012 H moved out - 27 Jun 2013 Legally separated - 6 Sep 2013 Closing the door and changing the locks
No 2x4 from me either, heck, I think you did very well actually. You cant possibly hold ALL frustration in check ALL the time.
I do have a couple of questions thou. 1. Your dating, or at least hanging out a bit with each other. a/ if you know crappy wife shows up on weekdays, but not weekends, can you hold out for a weekend only slot? 2. You think or you know theres is OM in the picture that she is texting?? a/ with the frustrations she has with you, especially when your driving. Do you think that helps push her TO the OM? b/ how much NC have you had with her, so she can see the affair isn't all that its cracked up to be? c/ what is she doing to work on herself/issues? IC?? 3. Looking at your join date, im assuming you've been dealing with this or at least off/on with this for a while? a/ are things getting any better, other than the changes YOUVE made?
Sounds like you've done a lot of standing, good for you. Do you feel at all like a doormat? You mentioned Plan B, do you feel like it? Is she MLC? I could go back and read some and get some answers, but looking in the past is like looking back at a different person compared to how you are now right? How have things progressed in your eyes?
MH, I don't know why you expected 2x4s, I think what you did was normal and human We need to react in some ways and you held it all in even though it was frustrating. Dare I say - been there, done that, got the T-shirt
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
. After all, that bookcase isn't going to care whether you deal with it or not, but your friends might not appreciate being less important to you than a little bit of decluttering.
No big deal. I hesitated for just a bit and when I saw she wasn't reaching for it, I paid. 
Of course I know very well who I think she was texting. 
There's a 99.9% chance she'll Skype or text me in the morning as usual.
. Just get that testosterone under control first 