- stop talking about OW as if she is the center of our problems.
Good. Also strive to stop THINKING about OW. Just try to remember that OW is not the cause of your marital problems, OW is a symptom. Your task is to address the cause.
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- stop pursuing by trying to convince him to stay ---- THIS IS HARD
It's not hard if you know how much damage you're doing when you apply pressure to him. Be mindful of WHY you shouldn't pursue.
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- be more rational and level headed when discussions of divorce present themselves (not losing it in tears and threats)
Going back to your earlier comment, both of you agreed to table it at least until the baby is born, so if he brings it up just remind him of that.
