W and I have been getting along great lately. I have begun to GAL and take care of myself and my kids. We are still living in the same house and sharing a bed. We have always gotten along well as friends. Still doing all the housework and trying not to obsess about her Facebook activity or what she may or may not be doing.
Just found out last night that she has begun to check up on me. I've been exercising (walking, running, working out). I've lost 40 lbs since all this began in June. Really beginning to feel better about myself and my relationship with my boys. I may be making progress, as she has gone from completely disinterested in me to beginning all conversations and having her best friend check up on my Facebook activity.
Bad parts: W cannot and will not tell me she loves me. I have told her only once in the past month. Very hard for me. Zero intimacy. No hugs, no kisses, no touch of any kind. This destroys me, as I am a big physical touch person.
Reading DB and several other resources. Trying to educate myself as much as I can about MLC and DBing. "Going dark" is not an option for me as we live together and sleep together.
Specific questions I could use advice on:
Our personal and physical distance from each other created this problem between us. If I do not pursue her in any way , couldn't that be seen as "more of the same"?
A 180 would be me being incredibly involved and attentive to her needs.
Where do I find the courage to really forgive her for her transgressions?
When she exits this MLC one day, will there be a great realization on her side of all the damage that she has left in her wake? She says she cannot cry about anything.
This website and community is a great resource. I am trying to live every day with the info I have learned here. Thanks to everyone.
Both 40 T-22 M-18 S13 S11
Bomb, ILYBINILWY-7/10/13 EA #1-confirmed 7/10/13, ongoing since 5/13 EA #2-9/13/13
