New to This - An English Man In Trouble

[Hadlee58]

I havent posted in a while, been keeping my head down and working hard, just thought i would write down some of my feelings/thoughts:
I completed my half marathon and under two hours which i didnt think i could do, felt great afterwards and my hard work had paid off, i am carrying on my running and am planning a full marathon next spring time.
Things at home have been going pretty well, a few ups and downs but i have tried to stay positive. Last weekend we went to a friend wedding and a family 50th. Both these have left me feeling pretty deflated and low, seeing others making the same vows i did and couples interacting well togther and looking in love made me feel very jealous.
Since the weekend i have been on a bit of a spiral questioning my position now from when i started in June. Things are better there is no question on that however my wife isnt in the same place as me (shes stopped reading her book). I am sure if i asked she will say the same - things will take time to get better. SHe still doesnt initiate or respond well to any R talk. On the positives we do enjoy time together, talk more than ever (thats me listening and validating), enjoy weekends with the children, have been on nights out together just the two of us and had the occasional nights of passion, more likely minutes if you asked her . I have worked so hard on the things that got us in this place, listening/validating, supporting and caring, my W has had a torrid time at work lately and i have done what any great husband would do to try to make things easier for her.
We lack any kind of intamacy (i dont mean sex) in general, we sleep in the same bed but as far apart as you can get, we dont cuddle or kiss on the sofa, apart from hellos and goodbyes and i am worried that this will be the path for the future unless something changes. As i said seeing others acting intimately together over the weekend has really got to me this week.
My worry is that we are heading towards a marriage of convenience for the children.
My heart is telling me that i should bring this up whatever the consequences and let her know how its affecting me however my head (DB mode) is telling me to carry on the path i am on in the hope she will get to the magical place, i am torn. I think she can tell this week that i am not in the best of moods, and whereas in the past i have always masked this portraying that i am happy i have lost the will this week to turn this around.

Hopefully i can get my chin back up soon!!