Ahhh Insomnia, the gift of the MLCer to us. I didn't sleep properly for a long time. now? I have a bad night every 4 or 5 nights, but it is usually a treat now, if that doesn't sound weird, as I put on the light, listen to the radio or read a book.
I felt as if my xh had robbed me to the capacity of sleep properly - stress and trauma I think.
They want to act as if normal, in part because they are not facing up to what they have done. The picture I get with so many MLCers is one of upright men who go off the rails, not, in general, rather dodgy people who have cheated all their lives.
Now it is hard to face having done something that violates so much of what you believed in, and denial is the easiest way out. The other, as we all know, if self justification - 'I wasn't happy, the marriage wasn't working, you were a terrible cook, you are too tall/short/fat/thin, you stayed home/went out to work' and so on. Delete as appropriate.
I think my current favourite form my xh is that I am 'an all or nothing person' Hello? Yes I wanted exclusivity in our relationship, [last time I checked most people do] and yes, some behaviours are not compatible with even friendship. Bascially I am not playing the current game he wants to play which is 'Let's pretend that nothing happened, that we decided to go our separate ways, and we can now play happy families and be friends, when I feel like it'
'No' really is a complete sentence,
In fact I wonder if we should have an exercise book with all the MLC scripts printed in them and tick them off when they say them? It would help to see it isn't personal!
