I agree with Breakdown. Pressuring her will not work and will likely only make things worse. This is a LONG process buddy and being in limbo for 4 months, while it $ucks and feels like an eternity, is really not very long at all.
I also agree that it usually takes something big to make the WAS change directions (especially when an A is involved).
Has she ever really felt like she's going to lose you? What things are you doing to begin moving forward with YOUR life (w/ or w/o her)?
Sigh, I have to agree with BD again here which isn't good for me . That is an excellent book to read
Personality is who the world sees, character is who you are
. That is an excellent book to read