I'm just chiming in with the others, you are getting great advice here.
It's weird, when I was in your shoes two years ago, this advice didn't make sense at all, and I tried to mind read and cling to every word and interaction with my W hoping for some glimmer of hope.
But now that I've made it through the other side, this all makes sense now and it actually works.
Early in my sitch, I hoped for a quick fix, I hoped she would see the madness and come running home. But now that I am wiser, I know that would have been a big mistake, we would have eventually gone right back to our "old" marriage which I can see now wasn't working. And now I know I don't WANT that old marriage.
The year apart was crucial, my wife and I both needed to grow up some, learn about ourselves, and have new experiences and make new friends. We both went to counseling (not together). I went a lot more than her and I learned so much about who I am and how to work on problems constructively.
And as an added bonus, I implemented some great projects at work that still are making me a hero here, I got into way better shape, and I met some new friends that are in my and W's life now.
So hang in there, learn about you, and try to enjoy this time alone. We are rooting for you!
