Hello! 20 year marriage teetering... (part V)

[AnotherStander]

I mentioned in the last post that W had not brought up the D in a while, it turns out it wasn't because it wasn't still full speed ahead! She sent me an update email and the paperwork is supposed to be completed next week. In addition, it turns out the petition was already filed over a month ago. In TX there's a 60 day wait (after the petition is filed) before a D can be finalized, little did I know that clock was already ticking away. So we could be D'd in less than 30 days. I felt a twinge of anxiety when I read the email but it quickly went away and the rest of my evening went fine, and I had no trouble sleeping. I've thought about it on and off, but I'm not upset about it. I've mentioned before that I dealt with the emotional fallout from this eventuality already, so now that it's happening it's not really affecting me much. That may change when I'm actually looking at the papers and seeing it in black-and-white, I suspect that'll be emotional. And actually having to go to court and hear a judge pronounce it over, I doubt that's easy either!

As a side note, my W has yet to say one word about the D to me in person. It's all by email, and when I see her she acts like nothing is going on. In fact ever since BD she has never once said the word "divorce". A couple of months ago she said something like she was "ready to move on" and I had to ask her if she meant "divorce" and she said yes. Just seems strange to me.

Aaaah, AS. Your stories inspire me to be happy WITH or WITHOUT my H.

Thank you.

Thanks, I'm glad it's helpful It goes to show that sometimes you can DB your heart out and still end up D'd. But like you say, when you get to the point that you know you'll be happy in life whether it goes on with or without your spouse, then it's a success story no matter what happens

And, good for you for getting in great shape! I feel it is all about how you FEEL you look, because when you feel good it radiates to everyone around you (although I'm sure you do look good! !)

Thank you, and you are so right, it really does make a huge difference in PMA and getting rid of the low self-esteem almost all of us are hit with after BD. The lady I date on and off calls me "the 20-year-old body" which on the one hand makes me feel like a piece of meat but on the other hand makes me laugh every time, especially because she always does this little hip-wiggling fist-pumping dance when she says it

I do hang out with cute guy at times but choose NOT to share this w H

I do the same, I don't try to hide it from W but I don't share it or flaunt it either. I don't date on the weeks I have the kids either, they're dealing with enough as it is.

Great dad moments on your last post!!

Thanks, I do have a lot of fun with the kids! I really miss D18, it's tough just seeing her once or twice a month. Won't be long before D16 is off to college too. Ugh!