AS- You are right that anger is really just pain in disguise. I think the "I love you" remarks affected me more than I realized. I am trying not to read anything into his remarks, but it IS interesting.
And, I agree that cute guy is probably not worth my time for LOTS of reasons. Not doing a great job of cutting him off completely though.
PS & Maritimer- I don't think the boys are confused about "things." They are old enough to understand that their dad lives somewhere else by choice. He visits their home EVERY DAY after school for at least an hour and sometimes longer. I am almost always not there when he is there. Nothing confusing.
I do NOT restrict how much he sees them. He can see them as much as he wants during the afternoons. He takes them 1 out of 2 nights of the weekend now.
I agree that the kids' R with their dad is AS IMPORTANT as their R with me. I am not trying to be selfish, but I am trying to fight for what I think is in their best interest AND for them to see their dad as much as possible.
It's just that H keeps bringing up having them overnight more & says that coming to the house is not a long-term solution. I agree if/when we are Ding. Not now.
jp- hey! Thanks for checking in with me! I'll check you out when your posts show up!
M- 18 T-21 S-14,11 & 10 BD 6-18-2012 (OW-EA) H moved out 11-3-2012 10-5-13 Me- I want a divorce. I want to move on w my life. 11-25-13 Jointly filed.