DD, I'm not sure that I have anything to add to what Accuray and Starsky's have said, except that I agree. Personally, I took what I thought at the time was the easier route- guilting, expressing pain, asking why she didn't work on us etc.. Turns out, that was the harder road- it just kept her fogged and resenting me. It wasn't until she had to face the very real choice of never speaking to me again and giving it a go with the OM or having to dump him to try to get her life back did she decide to stay.
Wish I could say it won't be hard. It will be. But living like you are isn't really living, is it? Like others have said, it has to get worse before it gets better. Come to peace with that and take the steps that you know must be taken. -hs
