Since I've not been in your shoes, I can only try to imagine how it would be for you. Maybe it's worse than if you had suddenly lost her in death. You would probably be shocked and may have questions that could never be answered. From what I've been told, when we loose our S in death, we eventually have to accept the fact they are not coming back.....and we see that life continues without them. And, we mourn.....hard.
I don't know if it's comparable to what you are going through or not. I'm just so sorry it left you feeling bewildered.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
