Last week I put forward the supposition, after a discussion about relationship and his (still) feelings for Massage Girl that perhaps he could remember that he used to have the same feelings for me when we first met as he has for Massage Girl...
He said he is getting to a place where he doesn't care how it ends with him and MG, which tells me he still has a ways to go there.
Just spent a week on vacay with the family and H's family. H and shared a room and bed together, ran, spent a couple of days going out, eating etc. Held hands, he hugged and kissed me in front of his family. We were together at his nephew's wedding. People kept asking H if we were back together and he said no. Which is very true, as I said, I want it to happen for the right reasons.
I had several people comment that I looked radiant, serene and happy. I said that I had found the path I need to take and the tranquility comes from walking it and from finding connections to the world everyday and just being who I was meant to be instead of who I thought I should.
H mentioned I looked beautiful
Got in his car to look for me when he outpaced me on a run and I decided to do a couple extra clicks. He remembered that my knee was bothering me (couple weeks back) and thought I might have hurt it and couldn't walk (I have my cell....)
Brought me blankets without me saying a word, drinks etc.
I gave him massages, complimented his improvement on running, his appearance etc. Made sure I touched him a lot
S17 asked, "What's up with you and Dad?" I told him that dad still has things to work on for himself, so we are still separated. I think S17 called him a drama queen...
Had a great week, H said he had a great week. Remember, previously he said he wanted space, but mentioned before he left today that "Not like we won't be able to see each other M T W Th F," (I have internship in city for three months)
I will leave communication to him as previously stated and gonna get crazy starting Monday...I am sure I will sleep sometime.
Oh, and a friend of my SIL who doesn't know us apparently commented to SIL one night "Wow. That couple over there is really in love. Do you see the way they look at each other?"
This morning I get a text from him saying that it was the best vacation he has had in years. That it was because he wanted to be with me and not had to be with me. I agreed and added that for me, when I have no expectation, just "being" it made it wonderful.
Normally I would say that looks like you are pursuing and you should back off, but in your case, I think that's pretty tame
I think the card I gave my XW on our anniversary last month basically said, "Our story hasn't always been easy, but it's ours, and I'd rather have it with you than anyone else." Did you read how that went for me? Wonder if yours will end similarly lol
Which is very true, as I said, I want it to happen for the right reasons.