What AS said and T1000 agreed with was that they want friends and family and their kids know it wasn't them who filed for the D.
We all had our role in what lead to the D. The ad isn't the fault of the person who files the papers.
Let me ask you this, if your actions caused pain to another but you didn't know about it, is what you did morally wrong? What about if you KNOW what you're doing is causing harm and you do it anyway? That is the difference between a WAS and a LBS. The LBS may have contributed to the M failing, but in almost every case they didn't even know it. And once they find out, what do they do? Scour the internet and library trying to find out what they did wrong and how to fix it. That's how we end up here. And we work HARD to fix ourselves.
Meanwhile, what does the WAS do? Nothing. NOTHING. Not only did most WAS's contribute just as much to the failing of the M, they are wholly responsible for the actual breaking up of the M, the bomb dropping, separation, and eventually divorce.
My W has driven us steadily towards D since BD. She bought the gun, bought the ammo and loaded the gun. I'm not going to pull the trigger for her.
I understand that some people have financial issues that maybe can only be resolved through D, but if that's not the case then I do not agree with you that it just doesn't matter who actually files. Maybe it means nothing to you, but it means a LOT to me.
But those LBS's who take that step, I don't hold it against them, every sitch is different.
