Let's see if FY owes me $100 bucks - of course, you didn't say WHEN he would reply!!
In less than a week after your reply. How could he not?
You most certainly have your life together more than he has his... and he likely knows this.
I'm happy to hear you're ok with taking things very slow. This puts you in the drivers seat where you belong. Drive On girl! (and be wary of hitchhikers!)
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
You are on - just replied to him so tick tock goes the clock!
And even funnier that you should mention being in the driver's seat; one of the "projects" was getting a (new to me) car which I dreaded doing and then of course, when my parent got sick, I just used that car. But I have made my decision and told xSO, that the car was on its way!
I didn't bait my hook with questions, Snodderly. But I did not mention what kind of car either.
Portia, You are doing great and your sense of humor is wonderful. Keep the bait dangling for he is sure to snap it up. He's not going to be able to contain his curiosity about the car! LOL!
Enjoy your weekend!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Portia, what a coincidence, I’ve been thinking (needing) a new car too. I also told H that it was in the works. But, I have to postpone it now, since I’m still not working.
I’ve been reading your updates. I agree with you and others here that something is going on in SO’s life that made him to start contacting you. I don’t really know what else to say, since I’ve been in similar situation before. Sometimes H starts contacting me more often and even forwards the jokes. Then he goes back into the hole. I have no idea what causes these moments of interest and then withdrawal. So, I just take it as an event in life and keep moving.
Hang in there, my friend.
M:50 H:52 S28 (my S from previous marriage) M:17 + 3 BD: 06/12 S: 06/12 - H works in another state
Portia "He's texting like everything is normal and we are catching up. Sigh. Strange."
That's so odd, Portia. Well it seems odd to us, but MLCers seem to operate in a different time warp twilight zone. It seems to me that you are on your SO's mind, and maybe in his mind, things do seem "normal" and maybe he's blocked the long periods of radio silence out. It sounds like you are handling this all so well, with your light and short tantalizing replies. It's SO hard to not know what's going on with your SO, isn't it? What he's thinking, doing, where he's living. I never realized it would be so so difficult.
I hope and pray FY wins this bet! How is your dad doing?
Linda
Me 65, Ex 64 M 38 y 2 adult S, 4 G-Kids MLC 11/07 BD 12/09 D 3/14 Dating nice guy 7/14 Engaged to nice guy 12/17
Portia... I agree with what snodderly says about dangling the bait. Make yourself seem interesting. Make him ask the questions.
Keep up the good work.
Magic!
M:46 H:49 T:20yrs myD:22 H distant summer/12 H sleeping in b'ment: Nov/12 BD: Dec 2/12 asked me begin to move end of Jan/13 moved Jan 7/13 (left my stuff) "agreed" to "working on r" Mar 3/13(lipservice!)
Just getting caught up with your thread, been away for a while, looks like you're doing great. Driving with the wind in your hair and the music turned loud......have fun with your new car
Take care of yourself:)
M 16 T 20 M 41 H 39 S 19 S 15 Bomb drop April 4; Moved out April 13 D started-full force ----------------------- Dancing through the fire Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me ROAR
Well, FY, I lost our bet spectacularly. (I hope xSO never knows I post here!) But I guess when you use filet mignon to bait the hook - i.e. a car (such a man-thing!) - they can't resist.
Within two hours, two texts. Of course asking what kind of car.
I am having some fun with this folks, since I can't figure what else to do and I don't want to worry, so I replied: It's not in yet, but when it's in, I'll show you mine if you show me yours.
Ahem! I even got a reply to that one within a half hour.
IDK what is going on or what has changed. But for every person that says by the time we are letting go or dropping the rope, that is when the MLC reappears, they are dead on.
The one question I want answered is where is the GF? Because, well, did I mention I am nosy? But otherwise, it was a fun exchange and I will take it as it is. It was so hard at first not to strike out and say something nasty. I believe that is why we are counselled to wait before responding, that deep breath really helps. I also believe that in acting just like me in these bits and pieces, he will truly come to know what he has lost.
Snodderly, BF, RosaL and Magic, thank you so much for your support. Half of the fun of this is sharing it. Yes, fun! Nothing may change and he may indeed still announce he is irretrievably moving on, but I am OK. He'll miss me; I never quite believed that before, but he will. As all of your spouses and partners miss you when you let them feel the loss of your presence.
Have a great day! I will catch up with everyone's threads in a bit. Linda, I sure hope you are having an awesome time on your trip! I love seeing England through your eyes. I travel quite a bit so I love hearing about all the small observations you are making since by now, I tend to ignore them.
I'm beginning to realize that I'll be ok too.......I can make if work for me and my boys if I have too. He'll miss me too, I think he is already but won't admit it, and like everyone else when I began to detach and told him I wouldn't fight the D he was shocked down a notch.
Have a great day too!
M 16 T 20 M 41 H 39 S 19 S 15 Bomb drop April 4; Moved out April 13 D started-full force ----------------------- Dancing through the fire Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me ROAR
I'm going to let you in on a little secret here. In the highly unlikely event that I lost our wager, and SO did not reply in the designated time frame, I was absolutely prepared to pay you your $100.
...In MLC dollars. Which of course requires much patience my dear! Then, as the months rolled by and you continued to look for payment, I'd offer you a patience shovel and tell you to go dig... deeper.
Quote:
I am having some fun with this folks, since I can't figure what else to do and I don't want to worry, so I replied: It's not in yet, but when it's in, I'll show you mine if you show me yours.
As well you should! There are so many ways you could go with this, all showing your fun side and that you're doing fine on your own. (without coming out and actually saying so, which means little to nothing)
A couple of idea's:
Well, I was looking at/thinking about getting XXXX but decided not to because of XXXX (making the X's personal AND funny)
Or:
Just bet him $100 that he can't guess what you bought in X amount of try's. Everyone likes to win money!
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
